…in the name of women empowerment

I never watched movies during my college life unless it was an Amir Khan or Farhan Akhtar movie. I can literally count the number of movies I watched during 4 years of my engineering. Apart from Amir and Farhan Akhtar movies, I watched biopics of MS Dhoni and Sachin Tendulkar because I am a die-hard fan of cricket and the legends. I spent all my time reading the books that interested me and writing my heart out on the blank pages. I literally wrote two 200-page books for the person I used to love, and also umpteen poems and one-liners. Little did I know that I can turn her into poetry but I can’t make her love me.

But life has changed now. I work at some corporate from 10 to 7, and I hardly get time to read apart from on weekends. I try to find time for reading after dinner but the work makes me tired enough to not concentrate on reading. I live alone away from the family, and have got to kill the time rather than spending it. I don’t like chatting to random people on Instagram or Facebook, and I don’t remember the last time I initiated a conversation with a stranger on social sites. So I either watch movies or The Kapil Sharma Show on my mobile. People are temporary, books and The Kapil Sharma Show are permanent.

A few day ago, I was watching “Bhoomi”, Sanjay Dutt’s latest, and knew the theme of the movie, but I wondered why they have to dig so deep just to pull out stupidity in the name of women empowerment. The girl asks her father about a line in Ganesha Aarti, why they say “baanjan ko putra det” instead of a putri. (Why do they wish a boy instead of a girl for a woman who doesn’t have kids?). I just wondered why girls never have questions while listening to Honey Singh’s songs and dancing their asses off, when all his songs represent girls nothing but mere objects.

The girl is about to get married when she asks her father that a girl has sasural (in-laws’ place) and maayka (parents’ place), but where does she has her home? I literally wrinkled my nose to this dialogue. Because I feel that a man has only one home, while a woman has two- maayka and sasural. But they have to dig the negative sides always. No?

And then I came over Twinkle Khanna’s comments at some event where she said, “Millions of Indian women fast for their husband’s long life every Karwa Chauth. My dear friend who just won an award does immortalize this in his movies (ref to Karan Johar) but I don’t think that our 3,033 gods are really listening. Because when the mortality charts show up, there are 147 countries above us where their men outlive our good old Indian dudes. So, ladies stop because it’s clearly not working.”

It really amused me. Although she might be right about the fact but we don’t go after the facts all the time. Karwa Chauth is not just about a longer life for husband, it shows the love of a woman for her husband, it shows that she cares, that she wishes a longer life for him. I swear, I was looking to buy Twinkle Khanna’s books every time I opened Amazon, but after her comment, I decided I’ll never read her books. This might show my bipolarity but that’s how I have always been.

Then I came across a female model (I forgot her name) who raised her voice in the name of women empowerment that women’s nipples too should be freed. It sounded disgusting. We all know that the bikini scenes in today’s movies have become more common compared to the movies of 90s. She wanted to free her nipples as well just because men are doing it freely. I understand that women empowerment is about getting equal rights as men or maybe more than that, but is it fair to go stupid in the name of women empowerment?

I also am a feminist who always feel the need of empowering the women. Two of my short stories have got nationally published, and both are about women empowerment. I remember an incident from my college life when we had the Personality Development class. Ma’am had given us a topic about women and asked everyone to speak out their views before the whole class. I was the last one in row to speak. Most of my buddies had taken dig at women saying that they wear short clothes to attract men, they should not wear such clothes and all. I didn’t like the way my buddies think. I just said, “Whether covered or bare, men will look at women anyway. A woman shouldn’t bother about choosing the right dresses, because even if she has worn a saree or burkha, a man is mentally undressing her.” Ma’am had asked my name, and she along with girls in my class, had an applause for me.

But when I see stupid things happening in the name of women empowerment, I feel that we are overpowering the women instead of empowering, and that women are always at advantages more than men. For instance, they have reserved seats for them in buses, they have separate ticket counters, some trains have women-only coaches, and many more.

Suggested reading: Everything happens for a reason

And at times when I am alone (which I am most of the time), I wonder that a day might come when a woman will come out and raise her voice in the name of women empowerment, that why should they bear the pain of pregnancy and periods when men don’t. 🙂

Virendra Soni

Please let me know what you think. Anything- positive or negative.

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